Confidence comes from experience

When people talk about confidence, they often describe it as though it's a personality trait that some people naturally possess and others simply don't. We picture confident people walking into rooms without hesitation, speaking without self-doubt and embracing opportunities without fear.

The reality is usually much more complicated.

One of the most important concepts in sport and exercise psychology is self-efficacy. This refers to your belief in your ability to succeed in a specific task or situation. Research shows that the strongest way to build self-efficacy is through mastery experiences, successfully completing challenges, even small ones.

Think about learning to drive, riding a bike or starting a new exercise routine. You probably didn't feel confident on day one. Confidence developed because you kept practising and proved to yourself that you could do it.

Stop waiting to feel ready

One of the most common misconceptions about confidence is the belief that it must come first. People often wait until they feel confident before applying for a job, having a difficult conversation or stepping outside their comfort zone.

The problem is, confidence usually comes after taking action—not before it.

Confidence is often built through evidence. Each time you step outside of your comfort zone or take a step forward, you give yourself evidence that you’re capable of more than we initially believed. Over time, those experiences build trust in your own abilities.

Even elite athletes experience nerves and self-doubt before competitions. What sets them apart isn't a lack of fear, it's their willingness to perform despite it.

Progress builds confidence

It's easy to compare yourself to others, especially when social media often shows only people's best moments. Many people compare their private doubts to other people's public successes. They see polished results whilst remaining fully aware of their own insecurities. It's no surprise that confidence feels difficult to access under those conditions.

Recognising how far you've come helps shift your attention from what you lack to what you've already achieved. Small actions create evidence, and evidence builds confidence.

Confidence isn't about never feeling nervous or getting everything right. It's about trusting that you can learn, adapt and handle challenges as they come. The more you act despite uncertainty, the more confidence you'll build—and that confidence becomes something real because it's based on experience, not wishful thinking.